the pub night lasted till 6am today
with some surprisingly deep conversations
to my eternal envy
but then again, there is probably a reason
why these usually happen without me
I’ve been aware of my party-pooper tendencies for a while now
Á. wrote to me today
asking me how much I’d be affected if he discontinued his monthly alms
and actually offering to remove his remaining stuff from the cellar
I thanked him for the money so far and assured him that I’ll manage
while also stating that I wouldn’t like to meet him
however ashamed I feel for this
I am a basket case
beyond repair
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