on the doomstown visits

I wondered here earlier

that these visits later look like

something quite removed from me

it was the same this morning

with sunshine pouring into the room and on my face

like a bad dream

(with some puffy eyes, oh well)

however

yesterday I was more aware of the process

and as tempting as it is to say that 

I have no control/responsibility over my mind these time

it may not be true after all

because I was fully myself when I first thought/felt what I did

and for a long time afterwards

so who can tell where that "line" is

or indeed if it exists